I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
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