they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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