Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
