i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Randomize
