The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
whose ass print is on the piano?
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Randomize
