You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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