Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
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