i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Randomize