Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize