the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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