I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
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