so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize