In the future we'll all be gay
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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