Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
