I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
