I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
So vagazzling was a success
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
