Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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