i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
