omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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