sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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