I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Life is so much better after having sex.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
