You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Randomize