Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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