But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
