What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
