Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
