We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
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