what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
