she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I am mentally ready for anal.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
