why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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