last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I just forgot I was standing up.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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