Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Randomize
