Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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