North Korea, Best Korea!
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
