So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
