this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
