I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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