i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
