I think scott just propositioned me for sex
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Randomize
