yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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