Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
