Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
third nipple confirmed
my poor anus
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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