Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
