yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
