If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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