jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
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