Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize