after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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