bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
