I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
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