I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
