i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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