In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
